2008's Blog Posts of the Month!

January 2008: The list of resolutions. 

Did any of these actually get done? Somewhat, I suppose, but "no" would be the honest answer. If I were to draw up a list of resolutions for the next year, they'd be variants of the items on this year's list, so I suppose that means I haven't yet fulfilled them, right? 

February 2008: Crazy bird.

A close encounter with untamed Nature.

March 2008: A day in March: food we ate, a game I played.

Okay, so this was my only blog post in the month of March. Good to see I knew how to focus on the important things, eh?

EDIT: Dratted spotty memory, I knew I was forgetting something. Our experimental physics (Physics 192) class went to Tagaytay for a "Science Camp", which was an overnight trip where we visited Caleruega, Palace in the Sky, ate bulalo at the market, had an amazing race activity, sang and drank and bonded as a batch. To me, it's something like a precursor to the Baguio trip later in the year, which I thought was better because we were a smaller group. Hehe.

April 2008: Walking tour of Intramuros!

That was a very fun day with org friends. We should do that again soon, guys! After graduation, okay, we're going on an outing or trip of some sort? Okay? Okay.

May 2008: A dispatch from the SIEMENS call center. 

Oddly enough, some of the entries from work (April-May) weren't cross-posted over to my Blogger. I forget/wonder why.

The month of horror, when I signed away my soul for pisos. Still, I suppose it was instructive, and those pisos probably paid for a lot of the stuff I still use to this day.

June 2008: Another day in the life.

Following our brief salaried existences we decided to seek out this Japanese restaurant in the Makati area that supposedly offered an authentic dining experience, Serynna. And it did. And we were properly humbled. Visited the Goethe Institute before lunch, caught a French film (with Maggie Cheung!) at Shang after.

July 2008: Tutoring high school kids.

I found teaching kids surprisingly enjoyable and satisfying, and discovered a love for using good chalk and chalkboards.

August 2008: The Black Man with a White Soul ( Part I | Part II )

First time to attend a silent film screening with live choral accompaniment, and first time to write a blog entry in response to a stranger, who was asking for details.

September 2008: Sarah's!

"Guys, guys! Sa Baguio na ulit! Doon pwede na maglasing nang seryoso! Bwahaha." Oh, if I knew how right I would turn out to be.

October 2008: Baguio!

Tough call, what with Kady Day and a trip to Puerto Galera in the same month, but I suppose, all in all, the five days and four drunken nights in Baguio would have to take this month's post of the month award.

November 2008: Start of the sem ruminations.

A month into the semester, and I was as dissatisfied, aimless, and clueless as ever.

December 2008: I guess you could call these resolutions...

And we come to this month. I only resumed blogging a few days ago, with this post detailing yet again my personal struggles with... myself. Tragedy.

***

Remarks:

Before having written this post, I was under the impression that 2008 wasn't a very eventful year. I guess my memory just isn't geared towards remembering events and happenings. I'm really glad I managed, over the year, to blog a few times each month.

This only serves to strengthen my decision to try and get blogging more regularly. There's a whole new year to be lived, and it sure does promise to be an eventful one (honestly, all of 2009 after graduation is still a big blank to me). Adventures await!

Happy new year, guys! :D

Domesticities: microwave oven, coffee maker.

My brother just got a fancy new stainless steel convection/grill/combination microwave oven to replace our old one that broke down some weeks ago. Good thing, too: it's really been a hassle, suddenly not having a microwave oven when everyone's already gotten used to the convenience of heating leftovers and various food items. Especially handy in a largish household where, more often than not, more food than can be eaten in one sitting is prepared.

It's a little intimidating after our slightly stained white plastic microwave oven, with its shiny steely professional look. It can bake your cakes! It can roast your meats! It can probably do quite a number on your poodle(s), too! Okay, what the heck am I doing blogging about our new microwave oven? Seriously, though, I hope the household cooks (i.e., mom and eldest brother) take advantage of the various capabilities of this thing. Roasted birds and various mammal meats sure do sound tasty.

In the same vein, I recently got an Aeropress, having found out about it when I was looking through ebay for espresso pots. It's been single-handedly responsible for increasing my coffee consumption because (a) it makes pretty good concentrated coffee (which some people call espresso; meanwhile coffee purists cringe) that dilutes nicely into a regular cup and also mixes well with milk for a great homemade "latte", and (b) it's so fun and easy to clean. 

The Aeropress is basically constructed like a big syringe, except where the needle would normally go, there's a detachable cap with holes in it that also holds a paper filter. To make coffee, you remove the plunger, put the cap on the main chamber, and set that on top of your mug. Put the grounds in the chamber, pour hot water in, stir for a few seconds, then put the plunger back in and push the water through the coffee, through the filter, into your mug. This whole process takes maybe thirty seconds to a minute. While this part is already fun, the real fun part is removing the cap and filter and ejecting the compacted puck of used grounds into the trash! It's quite satisfying. (So satisfying, in fact, that I had to explain the whole process just so I could talk about clean up.)

This brewing method is not without its drawbacks, of course. First off, it uses up more coffee than other methods - the included scoop is larger than average. Secondly, the resulting brew may be too "clean" so as to be perceived "bland" by some people who prefer otherwise. Personally, I like it better than the results from my French press which usually include a fair amount of sediment that makes it through the metal mesh. Third, the thing itself looks exactly like a big fat syringe. No style at all. And fourth, well, it doesn't really make espresso, as you'd need higher pressures for that, although I'm not personally acquainted with the exact definition, psi requirements, etc. 

Overall, though, I'm plenty satisfied with it. It's convenient, cleanup is fun, made of durable plastic, makes good concentrated filtered coffee. As I speak I'm feeling the effects of the second double-cup of the day, which I finished drinking maybe an hour ago. Maybe not such a good idea.

All this domestic (well, sort of) talk makes me want to have a house (kitchen) of my own to putter around in. I may be graduating soon, but I don't think I'll be able to move out in the foreseeable future. Sigh.

Another bloody mess.

So, a few days ago, Bambee dela Paz blogged about a terrible incident on the golf course:

"At around 1:30 PM today, at Valley Golf and Country Club, Antipolo City, Mayor Nasser Pangandaman, Jr., Mayor of Masiu City, Lanao del Sur, his father, Secretary Nasser Pangandaman of the Department of Agrarian Reform, and company, beat my defenseless 56-year-old dad and my 14-year-old brother to a pulp because of some stupid misunderstanding on the golf course."

According to her story, this mayor and three to four of his goons, I mean, companions, were the ones to initiate the violence, and proceeded to relentlessly beat up her dad and brother, not stopping even when they were already begging them to stop. Apparently because she and her family were brazen enough to complain about the mayor's behaviour, didn't they know who he was, did they not know the meaning of respect?

According to the venerable cabinet member in an interview with the Philippine STAR, however, they were attacked first by that barbaric, libelous family (teenagers these days!) with absolutely no regard for propriety, or body guards. After all, don't people realize how easily the facts can be skewed and misrepresented? Just ask the local police, and the staff of the clubhouse, now those are some fine, honest folk, they'll all respectfully corroborate the Pangandamans' story. 

Or not. I would certainly hope not.

On a more general note, you have to wonder just how often things like this occur. Politics in the rural areas does have a reputation for being bloody and violent, so perhaps something like this is more or less a common occurrence. Perhaps we should just be thankful that nobody was killed, which may be more than others who have dared to cross these warlords and their ilk before can say.

That's just depressing, though.

P.S. Some context on the man himself, the Warlord of Masiu.

It's that time again.

Having witnessed far too many times the power of negative habit formation, and realizing that the first half of this thesis semester is coming alarmingly close to passing by without significant trace, it would only be logical to attempt to reverse trajectory by harnessing the power of positive habit formation. In fact an attempt was made, early this semester, to facilitate the formation of good work habits through the creation of a detailed schedule balancing the required academic work with other pursuits. However, truth be told, absolutely nothing came of it. 

Although figuring out the details of the schedule was fun in its own way, it seemed that once it was actually finished and all set I lost all interest in following it. This could of course be put down simply to a disappointing lack of effort on my part, but I like to think that it could also be because of some personal incompatibility with rigid schedules. Of course, though helpful, a set schedule is not strictly necessary for habit formation. At least I've tried it, though I've got nothing to show for it now.

As the holiday season begins to wind down somewhat and the resumption of school approaches, I can't help but feel the need to give it another try. I have to finish my thesis in a few months, and with my work habits as nonexistent as they are now, I doubt I'll be able to do it. I do realize that to some extent my productivity will be boosted by the pressure that's sure to increase as the deadline creeps even closer, but I'd rather not rely on that effect alone.

I find that I almost always feel a small rush of hope (or more precisely, a kind of giddiness at the limitlessness of personal possibility quickly overcome by the crushing mediocrity of my actual reality) whenever I contemplate putting some new self-improvement plan into action. More often than not it's not due to the actual plan, but just due to the intention, the realization that, hey, some things may actually be under my control, after all. I'm not exactly sure whether my own experience has borne these realizations out.

I'm going to start small, now, and proceed in measured steps. I want to see where that leads me. First, over the next week I will get into the habit of waking up at 6 am or earlier, getting out of bed and doing some sort of exercise. Jumping rope with miscellaneous dumbbell exercises will do for now, until I feel ready to use the weights machine again. I won't force myself to exercise for any particular duration or at any particular intensity, I'm hoping there'll be time enough for that when the habit is already formed.

Also, I will dust off the old thesis/physics/research notebooks and also organize the various research-related files and documents languishing in their near-forgotten folders. I will make a point of spending at least a few thirty-minute or one-hour sessions every day just sitting down and going over my thesis materials. Progress on my thesis is obviously more urgent than progress with my physical fitness, but I still feel I should prioritize habit formation over quick results, and overly pressuring myself is bound to do more harm than good in this regard.

Lastly, I will resume blogging more regularly, daily if possible. This will serve as a form of writing practice, as well as "thinking practice". Again, I won't expect too much of myself for the first few weeks, just getting into the habit will be good enough for me.

And that should be it, for now. I suppose it could be considered a little too unambitious to be called a self-improvement plan, and even I would agree that it is, but then again it's supposed to be only the beginning. Okay, so for tonight I'll let myself off the hook and goof around, say one last goodbye to the lethargic holiday spirit. *tear*

Start of the semester overview and evaluation, and some career thoughts

Okay, I think I need to step back a little and evaluate the first month or so of this semester. It's just been a little too laid back, as if it weren't my last semester as an undergraduate!

Scheduling woes

The main reason for this is that I only go to school three out of five weekdays. Mondays, we give progress reports and attend a seminar on mathematical methods at Theory. Wednesdays and Fridays, I have Bio 11 with a lecture class at 7 AM (!) and the corresponding laboratory class at 11:30 AM. Tuesdays and Thursdays, I only leave the house in the afternoons, after lunch, if at all, and then only to have coffee or something, hang around with Jeanne.

A week or two ago I tried to remedy this problem by creating a schedule for myself, incorporating all the things I wanted/needed to pursue this semester. Thesis, raket, writing (fiction, essays, etc., for fun), programming (learning Python), driving (practicing), exercise, etc. But although I managed to create what seemed to be a workable, balanced schedule with the more important things being allotted more time, it still didn't work. 

I don't know if I should bother trying to revise the schedule or not. If I do, I think what I failed to take into account was how much energy each activity would actually require. I can't just jam my day full of different activities and expect myself to handle it every time. Possibly, I should put in coffee breaks, game/internet breaks, and so on.

It did meet with some success, I guess I should note here. By scheduling raket time on Tuesday/Thursday mornings, I managed to be a little more productive than usual, earning me something like 9k for the month of November. (Di ko papansinin ang mga hihirit ng "Libre, libre!" :P)

In almost everything else, though, I'm remaining/falling behind. Currently trying today to come up with some decent progress to report tomorrow. I don't know yet if I'll be successful, but I do have the entire rest of the day to work on my research, so there's hope yet. As for the other pursuits I set for myself, no progress at all. 

(Pauses to get some apple juice. Yum.)

Karir Tots

I've also been thinking recently about my job options after graduation, but no real breakthroughs there yet. Perhaps I shouldn't be all that bothered by that yet, and focus on coming up with a thesis and fixing all the things I need to graduate, but one can't help but wonder. 

Option 1: Article writing BS, este, raket

One option that could seriously be considered would be working full-time for this raket stuff that I'm already doing. I've thought about it out loud before, and basically I could end up earning nearly 17k a month just for writing a few articles per day. The stream of work from the guy I work for seems to be steady enough now to make it entirely possible to do it regularly. 

Before, when he was just starting out, sometimes there'd be dry spells when he would have no jobs from clients, and so even if I wanted to I couldn't do any work myself. But now he's employing a dozen or more writers and everyone seems to have work all the time. He even has editors and quality control people now. Aside: I find it somewhat amusing/inspiring that this guy actually is (in his words) "bulakbol sa grammar", yet now he's running a growing SEO/Internet content provider.

Anyway, the appeal of this route lies in the fact that it's a home-based job that only takes up a few hours a day. The rest of the day could then be devoted to whatever else I might be interested in at the time. School, developing other skills, and so on. But as this semester seems to be showing, my time management skills and motivation aren't up to snuff. 

Of course, the fact that this is boring, tedious, soulless work must be taken into consideration. Although to be fair it's only boring, tedious, and soulless for a few hours a day, and I get to be bored with this tedium and soullessness at home. A much more attractive option than holding down a similarly boring, tedious, and soulless 9-to-5 (like that Siemens call center gig I tried last summer).

Option 2: Corporate whoredom

Okay, so this isn't quite as well-defined an option as that first one. And the only step I've taken towards making this possible is a half-hearted application for the Unilever Management Trainee program. I don't have much hopes of getting accepted, but, hey, application just consisted of filling up a form and emailing it off, so, nothing much to lose, either.

As for working for other companies, I'm not so sure. Maybe some firm like Texas Instruments or Intel would have openings for technical positions such that my physics training wouldn't entirely go to waste. 

Basically, I lump under this option all jobs that would require regular hours, that are for some medium to large company, and that come with relatively sizable salaries. The tradeoff here is free time (and sanity? dignity? etc.) for more money. I'm not too keen about this prospect, but at the same time I can't entirely rule it out yet, either. I suppose working at some corporate job for a few months would allow me to decide once and for all whether it's actually worth it or not. (Indications would seem to point towards not, but hey, who knows?)

Option 3a: Teaching

Okay, this is also rather hazy for me right now, but it seems to be one of the most natural paths for physics graduates, so it won't be so hard to get into, probably. This could involve becoming an instructor at the NIP, while also taking an MS. 

Now, my only problem with this at the moment is that I'm not so sure I'm set on going into the academe, and I don't think I'm set on becoming a teacher full-time, either. I mean, I enjoy teaching and explaining stuff from time to time, but doing it for a living and as a career seems to require more patience and dedication than I'm capable of.

Teaching at Pisay could also be interesting, right? 

Option 3b: Academe

Okay, this is another natural development of my undergraduate degree, and more or less goes with Option 2a. Like I've said before, it's not that I'm not interested in doing research. I do enjoy interacting with the Theorists that I've met so far, and on the whole they're all interesting, intelligent people who love what they're doing. In contrast, I'm a waffler who can't decide whether he should be trying to love or not. 

So my beef with this path at the moment is simply my uncertainty. I don't know if it's a reasonable position, but I don't want to jump into the academe just yet, without being sure. Perhaps I feel this way because I can already see how it can swallow me up. If I end up finding out that I'm not cut out for the academe while I'm already inside, may the nonexistent gods help my nonexistent soul.

I would also want to be able to finance my way through education on my own. Mostly because I don't think my family sees the point in academic stuff, and I can't be bothered to try and explain. Eheh. So, even if I eventually end up choosing this path, I can't see how I can do it right away, after graduation.

Option 4: Okay, I'm all out of feasible options.

Working at the family business (brokerage)? Working odd jobs in some other country? Retreating to the mountains and a simple, rural life? Becoming a professional blogger/writer? Taking up law/medicine?

Summary, concluding remarks

Okay, so this has gotten a bit long and rambly, without really going anywhere, as usual. Basically, however, my current goal is to find some job that would still allow me enough time to at least keep other interests alive. Earn my first money, think hard about what I want to do with my life. Then go for it, after I muster the necessary money, courage, motivation, etc.

In this sense, the raket job seems perfect. But I'll have to see. It'd be rather hard to pitch to the family, for example. (They don't know about it. Eheh.)

If there were a job that would use my physics training, even just the problem-solving, analytical or mathematical part of it, that would also be a good choice. Keeping the old brain from dulling. Although I can also do some work on my own by studying further, no matter what job I end up getting (settling for? haha), anyway.

So, I guess, all in all, I'm not too worried. Part of it might just be a misplaced confidence in myself (that I'll manage somehow, that things'll work out), but at least it'll leave me free to worry about more immediate things. Like my progress report tomorrow. Should end this here and continue working. 

To the future!

Nagpupumilit na namang mag-Tagalog ang ugok.

Ngayong araw nagsimula ang enrollment, at katulad ng palaging nangyayari, kahit sa huling semester kong ito ay hindi ko pa rin kinayang tapusin ang proseso nang isang araw lang. (Ngayon naman dahil sa isang delingkwenteng propesor na hindi pa nilalabas ang mga marka namin sa klase niya. Pero ika nga ng adviser ko, "What's new?")

May nangyari naman sa akin sa UP kahit papaano. Nakuha ko 'yung mga papeles na kailangan, nakapagpalista ako sa huling kursong kailangan ko (Physics 200), at nakapagpagawa na ako kay Dr. Soriano ng sertipikasyong 9 units na lang ako ngayong semester (para sa Oblation Scholarship).

Pero dahil pumunta akong UP ngayon, nahatak ako ng mga batchmate sa Trinoma para mananghalian at manood ng Ikatlong Mataas na Paaralang Nauukol sa Tugtugin***. Pagkatapos ng sine ay biniro ko silang naiyak ako. Dahil siento-sitenta pesos at halos dalawang oras din ang nagastos ko. Natuwa naman ako sa ilang bahagi, pero sa kabuuan...

Ano pa ba. Pumunta kaming Toast Box pagkatapos. Nakakain ulit ako ng toast na may pork floss, sarap. Pagkatapos namin lahat magkape napasarap din ang tsismisan; pakiramdam ko nga ang ingay na namin (nila, haha) masyado. Pero baka ako lang 'yun, masyadong dinaramdam ang pag-iingay. Nung kailangan na naming umalis bigla kong na-miss 'yung Baguio na walang curfew curfew.



***nauukol sa tugtog ó tugtugin: adj. musical.
Source: http://www.gutenberg.org/etext/20738
Originally published in 1915.

Buhay Baguio: October 21-25, 2008.

Limang araw at apat na gabi sa Baguio: nakakapagod, magastos, pero sobrang saya. Hahayaan ko na 'yung mga iba kong kasamang mag-kwento nang mas detalyado, hehehe. Halu-halo na 'to, hindi ko na pagsusunurin nang maayos ang mga pangyayari. Basta. Makinig (magbasa) na lang kayo kung gusto niyo.

Ang ipinunta namin (kuno) sa Baguio ay ang conference ng Samahan ng Pisika sa Pilipinas (SPP). Pero ang nangyari naman talaga, nag-gala kami sa Baguio, tuluyang sinulit ang hotel, at nag-inuman gabi-gabi. (Kahit na hindi naman boring 'yung conference, siyempre kung ikukumpara sa mga iba pang mga pwedeng gawin sa Baguio, hindi rin siya ganun ka-exciting, pasensya na lang.)



Wala akong reklamo sa mga bus ng Victory Liner na sinakyan namin papunta at pabalik. Swabe naman ang biyahe, nakapag-usap naman kami ni Lei (na katabi ko sa biyaheng papunta) nang maayos. Okay lang din naman ang mga upuan nila, pero sabi ng iba naming mga kasamang napadpad sa may likuran, namamatay-matay ang aircon dun. Ah, basta, sa kinaupuan namin walang problema.



Maganda ang Bloomfield Hotel: bago, malinis, malapit na lakaran lang mula sa SM, UP Baguio, Session Road, Burnham Park, atbp. Mababait din ang mga staff. (Pero pangit ang Screwdriver nila sa bar, lasang matabang na orange juice lang. At siyempre medyo mahal rin ang binayaran namin, pero sa tingin ko nasulit naman.)

Maayos ang Executive Suite na kinuha namin. Tatlong bedroom, dalawang banyo, isang living area. Minahal namin ang sofa-bed kung saan naganap ang panginginom (at ang pamamato ng lobo at paluan ng unan).



Nakapagsuot ako ng leather jacket, halos gabi-gabi rin. Saan pa ba kasi magagamit yun dito sa Pilipinas kundi sa Baguio?



Nung isang gabi, nag-inuman ang halos buong batch sa Brew Yard, isang bar sa Nevada Square. Dalawampu't apat na katao, isang bandang game sa pagpapakanta kahit sa mga taga-Physics at 'di naman kagalingan (biro lang, Amarra, Fritz, Lei, Jorge, at Rica!). Special mention din dun sa mga natamaan nang todo: ang birthday boy na si Anthony, at ang mangiyak-ngiyak na si Rica (tungkol ba talaga saan 'yun, hmm?).



Iba-iba ang mga nasubukan namin. Nakakain ako ng pinikpikan, carabao milk yogurt, tortang talong na may kesong puti, sariwang gulay, mountain rice, at s'mores cake. Nakapag-jogging at boating kami sa Burnham. Bumisita kami sa mga Pink Sisters, sa Botanical Garden (medyo mahaba-habang lakaran ang naganap para dito), at sa Minesview. At, hindi pahuhuli, nakasubok kami ng strawberry wine, tapuy (rice wine), sari-saring cocktails, Kahlua, at Jack Daniel's. Nasubukan din naming mag-eat-and-run sa SPP: pumunta kami para sa merienda sa umaga, nag-SM, bumalik para sa tanghalian, pumuntang Minesview, at bumalik para sa Fellowship Night. (At, sige na nga, nasubukan ko ring malasing hanggang makatulog at magkulong sa banyo nang tatlong oras. Walanghiyang Gran Matador at Tanduay 'yan, sa banyo na nga ako natulog, masakit pa ulo ko kinabukasan.)



Sa dami ng mga napuntahan namin sa Baguio, para sa akin, ang naging pinakamasayang lugar sa mga ito ay ang suite namin pa rin. Doon, kami ay naglasing, nagkwentuhan (madalas hanggang madaling-araw), tumambay, at natulog (kahit na konti lang). Kaya maraming salamat sa mga batchmates at kaibigang nakasama ko sa suite: Amarra (special thanks sa 'yo para sa nilibre mong Kahlua, beer, cocktails, at Jack Daniel's), Laganapan, Lao, Lim (special thanks din para sa paghahanap sa Bloomfield Hotel), Mercado, at Suarez. (Special guests: Narag (tour guide!) at Uy.)



Saan ang next batch gimik? Siguraduhin nating may plano tayo pagkatapos ng graduation! Pero sa ngayon, pahinga muna, at ang unti-unting pagbabalik sa dating buhay.



P.S. Okay, that wasn't as hard as I thought. But it probably sounds a little weird to people who actually speak/write well in Filipino. (Lumalabas ang pagka-Atenista/Ex-Libris-UP-member kapag sinusubukan kong mag-Filipino, e.)